Writer’s Block

It’s November! Which means it’s NaNoWriNoMo – National November Write a Novel Month. I heard about this a couple of years ago while reading through some writing magazines I found in my local library. The idea is to have the first draft of a novel done by the end of the month. That means writing about 1500 words a day, which is about two pages type written. I write things out longhand, so for me that means about 10 pages a day or so. I plan to participate in NaNoWriNoMo this year for the first time, so I thought it appropriate to share some thoughts I have about writer’s block.

For most people, writer’s block is staring at a blank page with an equally blank mind. You sit down, you’ve got your computer up and running or you have pen and paper and you just go blank. It happens. My creative writing instructor in college told us about getting writer’s block while she was in college. She said her instructor told her to write a poem about it. Write a poem about having writer’s block? She thought he was nuts, but she decided to try it. It broke her writer’s block.

In fact, one of my favorite authors, J.A. Jance told a story about having writer’s block herself. It was a pretty bad spell of writer’s block, so she decided to call a college in her area to see about teaching there. When she explained that she was an author, the woman she was speaking with asked her what kind of books she wrote. She told them she wrote mysteries. The woman on the phone said, “Oh, we don’t hire your kind of author.”

End of J.A. Jance’s writer’s block.

For me, however, there are times when I have so many story ideas that sometimes I don’t know which one to work on. I’ll start one, then another idea will come along. I’ll make a note of it, but some part of me keeps thinking about the new story idea. Then I want to work on that one.

To make matters worse, every time I think I’m going to get to sit and work, something comes up. Lately, it’s been a lot of working to re-organize our house and hopefully create more space for ourselves in doing so. It’s also been that my retired roommate works during the early mornings when I’m trying to write. Even if he doesn’t knock on my door, I feel his presence. So, I get up and see what he wants.  I finally realized that the best solution was to do household stuff or miscellaneous things I need to get done in the morning, then do my writing in the afternoon. The only other solution is to go to my local coffee shop or library, but that’s not always practical. Although I do find that I get more work done when I’m at the library or coffee shop.

The last thing in my way was my extremely cluttered desks. Yes, desks, plural. I have a computer desk and an old fashioned roll top. I do my longhand writing on the roll top, which makes it easier to ignore the computer with all the internet temptations. It took me about two months to clear off both. So far, I’m keeping them cleared, which really helps.

Now if I could only decide what story to work on during “National November Write a Novel Month.”

Well, no one said the writer’s life was easy. 

My Neglected Blog

To any and all followers or anyone who has clicked on my blog in the last three months looking for something new, I apologize. I meant to post at least once a month, but I got discouraged about my writing space; namely the lack there of and pretty much quit writing.

I did try going to the library for quiet space or even a local coffee shop, but there were problems. There are a couple of libraries that are easy to reach from my house and one even has quiet rooms. The problem with the quiet rooms is that when someone opens the door to the one next to you, they usually don’t ensure that it closes quietly. I’d be sitting in a quiet room trying to write when suddenly – SLAM! Jolted out of whatever thought process I had going. So, I switched to a library closer to home and quieter. The biggest problem I found with trying to write somewhere other than home was the call of nature. If I needed to use the bathroom, I couldn’t just leave my stuff and go. I had to pack everything up to take it with me. That was a royal nuisance.

I finally realized that I really did have space at home to write, it was just cluttered. I mean I had important papers that I needed to file, catalogs from companies that I’d ordered from in the past and some I hadn’t even heard of sitting on every available space in my office. Then there were all the little scribbled notes I’d written about various things I’d heard about from other people that I wanted to look up. Adding to all this were writing magazines such as Writer’s Digest and The Writer. So, I decided that I absolutely had to clean up my space no matter how long it took. I’d tried to do so before, but never managed to finish in one day, so I’d shove everything into whatever space I could find, promise myself that I’d deal with it later, then forget about it or ignore it.  

When I started, I thought it would take me a month maximum. Ha! It took me just over six weeks, unless you count out two weeks being sick, then it took just over a month. There were days when I was so tempted to just give up, but I kept reminding myself that Rome wasn’t built in a day, this mess didn’t happen in a day, and when I was done I was going to have room to actually write. So, I sorted. I filed all the paperwork, tossed the junk, and found places for the magazines. Then I had to dust. I now have a clean uncluttered computer desk and a clean uncluttered roll top for hand writing drafts, journals, etc. All I have to do is keep it that way.

So, now that I’ve done all that work, I promise to be more faithful about blogging. I plan to blog at least once a month, if not twice. I hope you enjoy reading my blogs as much or more than I enjoy writing them. 

“Christians” and Homosexuality

As Christians or followers of Christ, we’re told in the Bible to love God above all others and love our neighbors as ourselves.* Yet the more I look around, the more I see judgment and condemnation of people. I see a lot of hatred for gays/homosexuals coming from people who call themselves “Christian.” Yes, I know that Sodom and Gomorrah were destroyed because the stench of their lifestyle reached heaven.

But think about this. God told Abraham what He was planning to do and Abraham spoke with God and convinced him that if there were even ten righteous men living in Sodom and Gomorrah, God should not destroy the cities. He started with 50 good men and kept lowering the number. Unfortunately, there weren’t ten good men to be found in the cities.

This indicates to me that God didn’t really want to destroy the cities, but the people had become so entrenched in their sins, He had no choice. I once heard a pastor say that he theorized that if Lot, who lived in Sodom, had truly lived his life before the Lord as a righteous man he might have caused others to follow after God as well and it’s possible that there could have been ten righteous men in the cities. So, what does that say about those “Christians” who point their bony fingers at the LGBT community in judgment and condemnation rather than showing them the love of God?

If we as “Christians” or followers of Christ started showing God’s love to the LGBT community and accepting them where they’re at, I think some would start to change. I’m not saying all of them will. There will always be those who will refuse, but if we show them God’s love, there’s a greater chance they’ll accept Jesus into their life and allow HIM to deal with their lifestyle.

I’m not saying homosexuals will inherit the kingdom of heaven. I do know that hell is real and is reserved for people who refuse to turn away from their sins. I’m saying that it’s not our place to judge people based on what we see on the surface. Only God truly knows what’s in their hearts and how or why people are the way they are. We love to quote the scripture about “Do not judge lest you be judged. For in the way you judge, you will be judged and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you.” Matt 7:1-2 (NAS)

It’s easy to forget that in John 3:16 God wrote:

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son that whosoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

Let’s think about just how powerful a statement that is. God sent his only begotten son. Would you do that? Send your only begotten son to save a world that had largely turned its back on you? God did. Now let’s look at the next part. “…that whosoever believes…” “Whosoever” is a really inclusive word. I don’t know how many times I read or heard this verse before I realized that God didn’t make exceptions. He didn’t say, “...whosoever except …” or “only the Jews” or “only the whites.” He said, “…whosever…” That means that you and I don’t get to pick and choose who we show God’s love to. That means that we are to show God’s love to people regardless of who they are or what they’re doing. I’m not saying it’s easy, because I know it’s not. I’m saying this is what God asks of us and that we are to do our best when the opportunity arises.

Only after a person gives their heart to God and seeks guidance about how to live for God should we tackle the subject of their lifestyle. Even then, I would say do it gently and be sure they’re ready. If they’re not, there’s a danger that they will backslide or walk away. No matter what, allow God to deal with their heart and lifestyle. Some people will be willing and ready the moment they allow God into their lives, others will have to come to it as they walk with God.

One last thought, in Matt 5:43-44 You have heard it was said, “you shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I say to you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you...” So even if you struggle with showing God’s love, you can pray that they will allow God into their lives and allow Him to heal their hearts. Prayer is a form of loving someone, especially if you pray they will allow God into their lives when you don’t like them.

* Matt 19:19, 22:35-40 Mark 12:30-31, 33 Luke 10:25-27 Romans 13:9 Gal. 5:14 James 2:8

Going Gluten Free

A few years ago I read “Wheat Belly” by Dr. William B. Davis. As a result, I tossed all the wheat flour I had in the house and cleaned out the freezer. I had a cake made with wheat flour in the freezer, which I took to a potluck several days later.

When I went to the potluck, I’d been gluten free for a week or so. I decided to have two tiny pieces of cake. One piece from the cake I’d taken out of my freezer, and one piece from a cake a young woman had brought. I’d put a different frosting on the one I’d brought than I usually did and wanted to try it. The other one was a homemade Tiramisu cake. Within minutes I felt like I was being sand papered internally. That’s when I knew that taking gluten out of my diet was a good decision for me.

Over time, I noticed other changes as well. Starting with the loss of eight (8) pounds. While I did gain it back, the fact that I lost it without doing anything else, told me even more that gluten was bad for me.

I think the biggest and most surprising change for me was my desire for sugar. It has become less. I still enjoy certain sugary treats, but I don’t crave sugar as much as I used to. Not only that, but some things I used to enjoy are now too sweet for me. For instance, “Kind” bars which are a nut or fruit and nut bar, sometimes with dark chocolate are something I really enjoy. My two favorites used to be, Dark Chocolate Cherry Cashew or Apricot Almond. Now, if I eat either of those flavors, all I can taste is sugar! Bleah! Thankfully they make other flavors I really like. My two current favorites are Dark Chocolate Chili Almond and Sea Salt Maple Pecan.

Last, but not least, I find that I’m more sensitive to artificial flavors. I used to absolutely love “Buttered Popcorn” flavored Jelly Belly candy. The last time I bought a small bag, all I could taste was the artificial flavor. I ate the whole bag thinking that at some point they’d taste as I remembered, but they didn’t.

I did try an organic spelt bread, thinking that maybe it was just the chemicals used to process standard wheat. It didn’t matter. I still felt sand papered internally, even though it wasn’t as strong.

Overall, I’m glad I chose to go gluten free. Despite gaining back the weight, my tolerance for sugar has gone down and real food tastes better than it did before. I also find that my hunger is more easily satisfied and I don’t get hungry as easily as I did when I ate products containing gluten.

I’m not saying this is for everyone, but it helped me.

Nagging God

 

Sometimes I feel like I nag God. “I keep telling him “we need . . .” or “we want . . .” There are even times when I feel like I’m being a whiny bitch. Or times when I say, “Not that I’m ungrateful for what I have, I am grateful, but . . .”

Then as I was reading my Bible one night, I came across a story in the book of Luke. In Luke 18:1-7 a widow goes before a judge seeking legal protection against her opponent. At first the judge refuses, but she keeps going to him to ask for justice. Finally he says to himself, “If I don’t give her legal protection, she won’t leave me alone.”

The Bible goes on to say how serious are we about our prayers to God? Are we asking daily or are we asking once or twice and then leaving it alone? God wants to know we’re serious. That doesn’t mean He’ll grant every request, but if you keep asking you will receive an answer. He may say, “Yes” or “No” or “Not right now.” He may even say, “The answer is on the way.”

There’s another example of perseverance in prayer in the book of Daniel. In Daniel 10, we read that Daniel had been mourning and fasting for three (3) weeks while waiting for a response from God. When he finally got an answer, he learned that God had dispatched the messenger the moment Daniel set his heart on understanding and on humbling himself before the Lord. But the prince of the kingdom of Persia had withstood him until Michael came to help him.

Now the messenger didn’t tell him that he’d been nagging God. In fact, he said that Daniel was a “man of high esteem.” Daniel 10:11 (NAS)

After reading what God said about persevering in prayer, I was much encouraged. You see, my roommate and I have been praying for something for a few years now. I admit, I haven’t always prayed about it daily.  After all, I didn’t want to be a nag. After reading the passages in Daniel and Luke though, I got more serious about that request and others.

I know now that if I want God to take my requests seriously, then I need to seriously be on my knees praying. I need to be like the widow who refused to allow the judge to give her justice.

One last thought, when we pray for something, we need to be prepared to accept His answer. I once prayed about something I truly needed. I finally realized that I needed to pray for the situation in a specific way. When I did, the answer I received made me wonder if God had lost His marbles and the universe wasn’t aware of it. When I finally learned to trust that God knew what He was saying when He gave me the answer I needed, my life improved in ways that I can’t write here. 

Transgender Restroom Usage

 

I’ve been seeing a lot of posts on Facebook about transgender people wanting to use the restroom for the gender they believe they are, rather than the one they are born as.

Just allow me to say that I have nothing against transgender people. Everyone I’ve ever met has been kind and considerate.

Having said that, I do have problems with sharing the bathroom with them. My problem isn’t so much transgender people as it is the abusers who would take advantage of such a situation by pretending to be transgender to gain access to potential victims.

I say this from two perspectives:

1)    As an adult survivor of childhood sexual, physical, & emotional abuse

2)  As a parent

Being a survivor of abuse, I understand the emotional damage just one incident can cause.

As a parent, I find it frightening that an abuser would use a situation like this to target a child. When my son was younger and needed the restroom in public, I’d stand nearby ready to rush in if needed. At times I felt like I was “stalking” the men’s room even though I knew I was just being a good parent. Thankfully, nothing ever happened. However, I shudder to think what could happen to innocent children when transgenders are allowed to use the restroom of their emotional gender rather than their birth gender. I don’t blame them for wanting to be safe, but I do blame the bullies and perverts for making this whole discussion necessary.

In locker rooms there’s also the issue of making someone uncomfortable. I know I would not feel comfortable changing clothes in front of a man or taking a shower after working out, etc.

It seems to me that the best and simplest way to solve this is to make single stall gender neutral bathrooms and changing rooms available in addition to the regular men’s and women’s versions. This way transgenders have a safe space to do what they need without infringing on someone else’s rights and abusers have no reason to enter the restroom of “their” choice.

A Non - Biblical Look at Gay Marriage and Abortion

Several days ago as I was scrolling through my Facebook feed, I saw a meme on a friend’s timeline about people being against stem cell research, gay marriage, and abortion. The idea was that no one could come up with non-biblical objections. I looked at it and thought, I don’t know anything about stem cell research, but I could come up with non-biblical objections to gay marriage and abortion. Then I moved on. Partly because I wasn’t sure I was ready to tackle that and partly because I wanted to see what else was going on in my friends’ lives. I couldn’t get it out of my mind though. So I went back to my friend’s timeline to look for it. After scrolling through the prior six days posts and not finding it, I decided I’d have to answer it here.

I’ll start with gay marriage. When you look at the way men and women are made, it’s pretty obvious (to me, anyway) that their bodies are meant to fit together. A man has a penis which fits nicely into a woman’s vagina. However, if two men come together, there is no natural place for them to insert their penis. They have to use the anus, which was not meant for that. Not only that, but to use the anus you must use some kind of lubricant as the body will not produce its own for that purpose.

If two women come together, they have their vaginas, but no penis to insert into either. For them to have any kind of sex life, they must use their hands, mouths, or toys designed for that purpose.

The physical builds of the two genders alone tell me that two people of the same sex should not marry.

There is one more reason though – children. If a gay couple want children, they must seek outside help. They must either adopt, hire a surrogate mother or in the case of two women, one or both could use a sperm donor’s sperm to get pregnant. There is no way for two people of the same gender to get one another pregnant.

This brings me to the subject of abortion. I’ve heard for a long time that it’s a woman’s body, therefore it should be her choice. I’ve never understood that. Especially since as I mentioned above, it takes two people, a man and a woman to get a woman pregnant. So, the baby is comprised of DNA from two people, not just one. Not only that, the baby only occupies a woman’s body for approximately 9 months. It’s not like a cancer that will eventually kill you. It’s another human being comprised of DNA from two people, not just one.

I did ask someone once, how it was “a woman’s body when it takes a man to get her pregnant.” She refused to answer at first because I’m clearly a Christian. I told her that I hadn’t mentioned the Bible: I’d simply asked a question. She told me it was too complicated to explain.

I know, you’re probably asking, “what if the couple used birth control and still got pregnant?” Well, we all know that birth control is not 100% guaranteed, unless a man has a vasectomy or a woman has a hysterectomy. A woman getting her tubes, “cut, tied, and fried” as one friend of mine used to say, isn’t an absolute guarantee. I’ve heard that in rare cases, the body heals the tubes or grows new ones. As for the pill, I’ve personally known two women who got pregnant while on it. Condoms, sponges, contraceptive jelly, and diaphragms can all fail. If you have sex, even with birth control, there’s always a risk of getting pregnant. It only takes one sperm getting through.

I also think that abortion for the sake of convenience to the woman, is ultimately selfish. You may not want the baby, but there are hundreds, if not thousands of couples who can’t have children on their own and would love to have an infant. They would gladly adopt the unwanted babies that so many people abort.

There are however, two reasons for which I do understand getting an abortion. The first would be medical. If the mother’s life is in danger because of the pregnancy or if the baby won’t survive.

If the baby isn’t going to live, then I don’t think a woman should be forced to carry it till it dies.

Here’s a link to a story about a woman whose child wasn’t going to survive: http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/04/07/the-hardest-abortion-i-ve-ever-had-to-perform.html

I also read a story recently in which a woman was forced to carry her baby till it died, because she was more than 14 weeks pregnant. If a doctor can tell a woman with certainty that her baby isn’t going to survive outside the womb, then I think the decision about what to do, should be up to her.

The other situation in which I can understand having an abortion is rape. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but it happens and in some cases a woman gets pregnant as a result. In that case, I can certainly understand and accept it if a woman wants an abortion. I would hope, however, that she would carry the baby to term and if she doesn’t want it, give it up for adoption. It would be a way to have something wonderful come from something awful.

So, for those of you seeking non-biblical answers to these questions, those are my answers.